Why it is so advantageous to be an introvert as a child and a teenager?
For me, being an introvert in my childhood and my early days as a teenager was a real hard thing.
I don't know how it is like to still be an introvert at maturity because that is beyond my scope of concern.
You know that feeling when you know that you have to meet and talk to people to have your life going but that is really the hardest part.
Family reunions, meeting with colleges, parties and many other events including people you know and others you don’t. All this had gave me the hardest times of my life. But you know what?
When I turn to think about those days and look at them today I feel that I was blessed being an introvert at that stage of my early life.
Here is how.
The more you exercise the better you become
I have many colleges that I know well who have been the farthest from been introverts at their childhood.
But seeing them in these days I was surprised to see how they have changed not to so social or so successful in their lives.
Being an introvert have always been a challenge for me. Meeting new people was something like a hard thing to do.
Even seeing known people had been an even that need mental preparation for me.
I knew I had to overcome all those feelings and that’s what have made daily challenges for me.
First I felt it as a hard thing to do. But then I enjoyed being challenged by facing new social and psychological experiments.
The more you demand from yourself the more you expand
Later, I knew that facing your fears is the best way to expand and to beat them.
Nowadays I’ve heard it from Tony Robbins that facing your fears is like stretching your mind to do new things you couldn’t ever think you were able to do.
I’ve heard him saying that what you can’t do you must do. That is what exactly I had in mind while I’ve been trying to transform myself from being an introvert to a person who doesn’t fear facing or meeting people.
Also, being an introvert had helped me seeking new skills for personal improvement. Feeling that you are always in a challenge is a good feeling if only you could manage the stress and get the suffering out of it and enjoy the whole process.
And that exactly what I did.
I felt like facing my fears is a lot enjoyable feeling than being afraid of them all the time (even when it could lead to troubles sometimes).
The Mask Effect
What you really lack is what you really desire the most.
I’ve learned that the feeling you have always had becomes the inner desire that keeps moving you. Being an introvert had been motivating me to becoming a better person on the social and psychological level.
This has helped me more to read and experiment on that field.
People are social creatures. All around history there has been a strong need for communication between them.
But these days this need is so critical with the introduction of new technologies and relationships between people, companies and countries.
“If you don’t talk to your neighbor you are out of business”
That’s another one I heard from Tony Robbins.
Self-talker and Good listener
Being a good listener can be thought of as a self-talker.
I previously have been asked why I didn’t talk too much. Part of the truth was the fact that I had nothing significant to say or I’ve been afraid/shied to say it.
The other part of it was the fact that I’ve always been a good listener/learner. People interpreted that as silence, self-talk or shied state.
Internal vs Outer show
The truth that I had much more important show that had been playing in my mind that entertained me more than any other outer show in the real world. Not self-talk but deep thinking, observing and making mental connections.
Later, I’ve learned that while I can enjoy my internal show, I had to act in the real world and to avoid the possibility of having the destructive self-talk.
Watch out having too much of Axioms
You need to transfer your thoughts to others continuously. You have to be careful form having too much axioms into your mind.
You have to watch yourself and protect it from being a continuous receiver from others.
In my early life, I had a lot of axioms and it felt good to me.
It worked good for me and had helped me to gain a lot of knowledge and avoid a lot of pitfalls in daily life.
But when I had to interact deeply with more people I found that having too much of axioms can be useful but can be also a source of many problems.
I you take everything to know as axiom from other people you may end up feeling disappointed when they don't do what you've expected them to do.
You may want something from other people and expect them to do it but they have no idea about it.
There may be a case when you help others by telling them what to do but you might think that they also know it as an axiom so you don't tell them.
You need to make sure that those axioms don't get into your way of success and into the way you communicate with people.
Quiet people have the loudest minds
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